When I played my first video game, I was likely three or
four. It might have been the first Super
Mario Bros., but I have vague memories of it. They just seemed like board
games, but with a TV, a gray box, a horizontal remote, and a bunch of wires. To
me, it was just another toy. But then, I got a PS One for my ninth birthday. It
was this small, white box that had a different kind of controller and buttons
than the Nintendo Entertainment System. I had two games for a while: Crash Bandicoot 2 and Spyro the Dragon. Games became more
interesting then, but I wasn’t exactly passionate about them… until I was given
a game by my cousin. It was called Final
Fantasy IX and I had never seen anything like it.
With other games, you had this world to explore or levels
to complete. Your goal was to get gems, punch baddies, save some princess, or
whatever. They were all these “Do ‘A’ to get to ‘B’, and then you get ‘C’” kind
of games. Final Fantasy was
different; it started with a movie. I watched the short FMV sequence that
showed highlights of the games cinematic cutscenes, then the main menu
appeared, all whilst this tune played:
It was all jaw dropping to me at the time. Instinctively, I
hit the X button to start a new game. Another one of those movies played. I
watched the entire thing in awe, then the movie ended with a transition into
the actual game. I was controlling a humanoid character with a monkey tail. He
had his own dialogue via text box. After clicking through it a couple of times,
he lights a match and I move him to the center of the room. Immediately I
notice a “!” mark. I click X to see what happens and light the lamp in the
center of the room. The room fills with light and a voice calls out from
another room. I get this prompt to enter a name for the character I’m
controlling. Technically I could change it to anything, but I wanted to keep
the default name: Zidane.
The source of the voice reveals itself to be one of several
people who enter the room and salute Zidane. Seems like they’re a gang. One of
them asks where the boss is. At that moment, some guy with a dragon head shows
up and attacks. It is here I’m introduced to how the combat system works. You
wait until a little blue bar fills up, then select a command and act. It didn’t
take long to defeat this uninvited foe. Turns out it was the boss who got his
head stuck in a dragon mask.
From then on, the plot carried the narrative and I was
hooked. I met many likeable characters, befriended some Moogles, fought deadly
beasts, and even learned defeat at the hands of Gizamaluke. It would be several
years before I tried the game again. This time I got past Gizamaluke and
continued the story. Unfortunately, the fourth disc was corrupt and I could not
finish the game without it freezing on me. I was nine years old when I first
played the game and I didn’t finish it until I was eighteen. But ever since
that first time playing, I’ve wondered how to create something like this.
This was the game that made me want to make stories. Other
games were about gameplay, but this one was about the narrative. Books were fun
to read and movies were great to watch, but the medium that is video games
convinced me that this was my favorite way to experience a story. Regarding the
title of this article, I suppose playing Final
Fantasy IX was the “how I got into games”. But what is the “why”?
I got into games because I wanted to build stories, craft
worlds, and impress people like how I was impressed with Final Fantasy. However, I met a lot of criticism along the way of
getting here. I don’t mean bad feedback for games I’ve made (I haven’t exactly
made a lot as of this article). I mean peers and adults saying that it isn’t
worth it. “There’s no money in it.” “It’s highly competitive.” “Games are for
kids anyways.” “You would be better off with a real job.”
First off, I’m not looking to get rich or successful. I
just want to be fulfilled. As for competition, there are a bunch of people like
myself who want to make their own games, but how many of them will actually get
to do that? I might not even be able to. The closest I may come is to working
on assets or playtesting. We all have these ideas of the perfect something, but
that may never ever come into existence. I’m surprisingly okay with having some
of my lofty and ambitious ideals stay as thoughts in my head because they sound
pretty good in there anyways. Third, games are not just for kids; they’re
beneficial to everybody. They fulfil certain needs in various players. The
games I play have me either feeling really powerful and accomplished or useful
to the team I’m playing with. And for those who say I should get a real job,
making games is strenuous! You’ve got to make sure the design is worth
implementing, ensure the aesthetics look appealing, and fix and tweak
everything so the game doesn’t break when it’s shown to the public. How is that
NOT a real job?
But there’s other things that make me interested in games.
The storytelling is the biggest part, but I could also be part of this team of
developers making inspiring products. Maybe I’m making games that convey a
message or make you think. Games are becoming more than entertainment; they’re
starting to reach the state of being an artform. I’d like to see them reach
this milestone, but I’m also fine with making and playing games meant solely
for fun. As for the industry itself, I get the impression that they don’t need
any professional game designers at the moment.
Because
of that, my interests started to drift towards non-digital games. I even
started contemplating other industries simply because of the possibility that I
could enjoy it (voice-acting, music and sound, animation, special effects, UI
design, it’s seemingly endless!) And yet, you can’t exactly be in all of those
fields. You have to start somewhere, ideally with something you are most
interested in. For me, it’s game design and narrative. The other fields could
be hobbies I pick up, or they could turn into some kind of calling. A friend of
mine once told me this: “Even if you don’t know what to do, do something.” I
may not get the perfect job, but I will follow his advice. I WILL do something.
To all of you reading this (especially students just
getting into this program), really think about why you want to do this. You might have your eyes set on creating
concept art, but why specifically that? Is it because you have some good
drawing skills and making pictures all day is an easy way to success? Is it to
reach a level of fame and reputation? Do you hope to change the industry in
some way? You might see it as a way to make an easy living and will work
extremely hard to make it happen. Creating anything takes a lot of energy out
of you and leaves you too tired to do anything else. Are you willing to
sacrifice that lost time and energy for this career path? Perhaps, but lots of
folks want to do concept art for similar reasons. Then again, I’m not you. Your
reasons could be vastly different from anyone I’ve met so far.
If you have your eyes set on a goal, remind yourself of why
you’re doing it. Once you have a solid reason, the “how to” part will become
trivial. You will figure out how you’re going to do it. I wanted to write
articles for this blog because I wanted to contribute to an organization. To
pass on some information gathered from observation and some experience. I also
wanted to see if others would have their own viewpoints and opinions. With all
of those reasons, I have little trouble coming up with topics every week to
write. The “how to” was solved. If I lose the “why”, I’ll never write again. I
want to create, analyze, write, and play games. It brings me joy and
fulfillment to do all of those things despite how arduous it is.
What
is it you want to do? Why? How will you pull that off? Take as much time as you
need. The world won’t end just because you haven’t made a decision or picked a
path. Enjoy what you do now, but know why you’re doing it at all.